Alpha Protocol is unique in that it is a Role Playing Game (RPG) set in a universe other than Science Fiction or Fantasy. One would be mistaken for thinking that RPGs are solely the realm of anti-social, sexually retarded, LARPing Cos' players. Well I for one am only some of those things and I still enjoy RPGs. Having yearned for a non Science Fiction or Fantasy RPG for as long as I can remember, I was very excited when I first learnt of Alpha Protocol for the Xbox 360.

Alpha Protocol is a modern day spy thriller from RPG specialists, Obsidian Entertainment. Players assume the identity of rookie spy Michael Thorton as he enters a world of secret intelligence agencies, grand conspiracies, espionage, weapons dealing, rouge agents, assassinations, terrorists and water boarding etc. Being played in a third person perspective and being a spy genre game, comparisons to Tom Clancy's Splinter Cell series are inevitable. Unfortunately, what may seem a logical comparison is in fact rather unfair to Alpha Protocol. Third person action/stealth games are very much what you see is what you get kind of games. If you are in the open and a guard looks at you, you expect them to see you and to react accordingly (unless you are hiding in a cardboard box of invisibility). Likewise, if you aim a weapon and pull the trigger you expect to hit your target every time.

It is important to remember that Alpha Protocol is an RPG, not a third person action/stealth game like the Splinter Cell series. RPGs are more like what you imagine is what you get. For instance, abilities and skills are based on statistics and chance, not reflexes and motor skills. If you are levelled up in the stealth department then in an RPG it is perfectly ok to literally become invisible for short periods even if on screen you are completely in the open. In Alpha Protocol sometimes you have to accept the RPG devices for what they are rather than what you would expect to occur purely from what you are seeing on screen.

The story of Alpha Protocol is predominately told through a series of cut scenes both during and between missions. A clever use of flashbacks ties in the choices that you make during the game with the main storyline, slowly revealing the major plot points. The cut scenes look terrible with a ghastly ‘fake' depth of field effect but the voice acting is top notch and the writing is decent. There are numerous branching paths and endings in Alpha Protocol and I felt that my choices had far more of a bearing to the outcome of the story than is present in many other games.

In Alpha Protocol these choices are often made during cut scenes mid conversations and the way conversations are presented is both unique and innovative. You are given the choice of four styles of responses leading up to a decision point which is triggered when a bar reduces to zero. You do not know exactly what you are going to say which is both good and bad. It is good because you don't read a response and then hear it spoken, eliminating repetition and making the conversations flow far more naturally. The pacing also flows more naturally as you cannot take as long as you want to study your possible responses and tension can be added by reducing the time you have to make said response. The only drawback without knowing exactly what you are going to say is that when you do chose to respond in a ‘suave' manner for example, you could instead actually come across sounding like a douche. In this case, that is a risk that I am willing to take.

So far so good but let's have a look at some of the things that Alpha Protocol does poorly for an RPG. Firstly, where is my effing loot? In an RPG I want to be able to strip enemies of everything that they are carrying, including their +3 Defence Underpants of Resilience. Half the fun of RPGs is managing your inventory and always being on the lookout for better weapons and gear. In the early part of the game enemies do not drop anything at all when dispatched and they never drop weapons. Towards the end of the game money rolls and ammo are commonly found on corpses but what about all their cool armour, gadgets and oh, did I mention weapons!?

Speaking of inventory management, in Alpha Protocol your inventory is accessed by pressing up on the D-pad. From this screen you can equip one of two weapons and up to three different types of ammunition by moving the Left Thumbstick. The Left and Right Triggers cycle through another two screens, one for gadgets and one for talents. The number of gadget slots and capacity depends on your equipped clothing and available talents are based on how you have developed your character with Action Points (APs) but more on that later.

The levels in Alpha Protocol are extremely linear although they try and give the illusion of choice. The first mission/tutorial is terribly designed and does not leave you with a favourable first impression. Things do improve as the game goes on but when the only way is up, you would hope so. Unfortunately, the game world is as lifeless as Kevin Rudd's political career and there is no exploration outside of missions. What good spy thriller doesn't have a chase through a crowded market or city streets? The set pieces in Alpha Protocol are completely devoid of life other than yourself and a spattering of goons.

This brings us to the games graphics. Alpha Protocol has some of the worse graphics of any Xbox 360 game ever. They are barely higher resolution than the original Xbox, which simply does not cut it these days and not only that, but they are marred by atrocious texture pop-in. If you thought the texture pop-in in Halo 2 was bad, you have not seen anything yet. Quite often (usually after a loading screen) the entire game world loads with nothing but the base texture colours and does not apply the proper textures until seconds later. It is not like the game looks like Gears of War or anything, even with the full textures it still looks pants and not sexy hotpants, I mean arseless chaps pants! Interiors are sparsely populated with repetitive boxy props. Shadows and lighting are simple and animations are awkward and unrealistic. The crouched sneaky running animation is laughable at best. The pantsness does not end there as the developers of Alpha Protocol have made some terribly archaic design decisions that were once common place but are now just considered lazy.

What lazy archaic design decisions I hear you ask, how about disappearing bodies for one? Now if the game had incredible graphics with highly detailed character models, I can understand why bodies would eventually disappear. But Alpha Protocol has neither incredible graphics nor highly detailed character models so there is no excuse. If you down an enemy and then look in another direction for a few seconds, when you look back the body is gone. What makes it worse is in a game when stealth is an option, why remove the tension of enemies finding the dead bodies of their comrades and acting appropriately? Occasionally in Alpha Protocol, enemies will get to a corpse before it does the Harold Holt, but standing over the limp body for a few seconds willing you to shoot them in the head is about as excited by their gruesome find as they get.

Moving on, the poor general game design choices in Alpha Protocol are many. These are the main ones that got on my nerves. Phantom doors, why do apparently normal hinged doors magically shut themselves or open once key conditions are met? Why when performing an action on something such as opening said magical door, does animation A transition to animation B by my character freezing and sliding from point A to point B? Did they just forget to program that animation? Why can I jump across a chasm when there is a little yellow logo floating in front of it but I cannot step over a knee high wall or for that matter jump at all except at set points in the level? If I can shoot out that window next to the door, why can't I climb through it instead of having to wait for the door to magically unlock after a checkpoint? Why be able to make your character a martial arts master when there is only one melee attack button and no combos? Why can I only use sniper rifles in very specific places and when I move on, I have to leave the rifle behind? Also, why in an era of immersive gaming experiences when developers try to minimise or cleverly hide loading screens, does Alpha Protocol pause the game, blur the shit out of it and make me wait while a huge logo rotates in the corner for three to four seconds? And for that matter, what is it loading exactly? The textures load after the bloody loading screen finishes...

Finally, there were two buggy moments in the game when I could not progress any further without reloading a previous save. Once I had to defend an area for a period of time but that time never came, even when the waves of enemies had given up, stopped coming and sent their resumes to a competent developer. The second was during one particularly linear level where the only way through was to use a zip line. When I reached the yellow logo that usually signals that you can do something, it would not let me actually use the line. After I reloaded a previous save and played through the proceeding action all over again, both bugs did not occur again.

If you are still reading, then you are probably a hard core RPG fan or are just curious to see how bad this game can be. Well not everything in Alpha Protocol is doom and gloom. Having already praised the story and conversation system, what else does Alpha Protocol do right? Remember those qualities that make RPGs great? Well, this is one area where thankfully Alpha Protocol delivers.

Playing as a specific character, namely Michael Thorton, sadly I could not use my usual avatar name of Daddy Mooseballs. This is a shame but understandable as Thorton is referred to by name during most of the game. You can however dress him up a bit and playing the game with a lumberjack beard did sooth my naming sadness somewhat. As per all RPGs, Daddy Mo...I mean Thorton, goes up in level as he gains experience points (XP) throughout the game. Going up a level makes you better all round but also earns you action points (AP) which can be spent on skills. Skills include, stealth, various weapon proficiencies, technical skills, toughness and martial arts. Things begin slowly but you will eventually be able to choose a character class and select three skills that can be potentially upgraded higher than all the others. This really determines how you are going to play the game because there are not enough AP in the game to be a master of everything. You need to decide how you want to play the game and sacrifice AP in skills that you will not use in order to maximise AP in others. The entire upgrade path is always visible so you can determine if a path is worth the effort or not before committing to it.

Skill upgrade paths have points that when reached, translate into active abilities or talents. For example you may earn the ability to sense the position of enemies around you, or slow down time and target multiple enemies with your pistol or even become completely invisible for a short period. These abilities may not seem realistic but it is how the RPG elements integrate with the gameplay and are on par with spells and buffs in traditional RPGs. These abilities once earned are selected in your inventory and activated with the Left Bumper. Skills have both an effect duration and a cool down period before they can be used again. Overall this system works well, but sometime you can forget that you are not playing an action/stealth game and have to adjust your approach to suit your specific skill set.

Additionally, how you play the game determines what perks you earn. Perks will appear regularly throughout the game and reward the way you play. Think of perks as in-game achievements that have a permanent positive effect on Thorton once gained. For example, perks can grant you additional XP or AP, increase a skill's effect duration or cool down, make you stronger, make you more accurate with preferred weapons, increase your stealth abilities or grant you discounts at the Clearance House.

The Clearing House is an online black market superstore. It can be accessed from the computer in your safe house or prior to beginning a mission. Cash can be spent on weapons, weapon upgrades (improved sights, magazines or barrels, etc.), ammunition of various natures, armour, gadgets and more interestingly, intelligence. Purchasing intelligence for a specific mission can make that mission easier by giving you a map, lowering enemy resistance or giving you additional mission objectives. You can spend the money on gear instead but the mission may be more difficult as a result. You can also purchase dossiers on key characters and factions within the game which although interesting to read had little impact on gameplay or the story that I could tell. The Clearing House is well stocked and choices that you make in the game will vary what is available and at what price.

Email is another important part of the game in between missions. Your email account is access within your safe house and provides opportunities to build on in game relationships. Occasionally, you have the opportunity to use information that you have gathered for monetary gain through blackmail, extortion or leaking it to the press. Relationships are an important part of Alpha Protocol as how you relate to other characters makes them either like or dislike you. If a relationship is positive, neutral or negative it will determine what support an important character can provide you or if they trust or distrust you. Different characters respond to different approaches so when being jovial may work with one person you may need to be more professional or even intimidating to others. At times your ability to convince someone to help you will depend on your manipulation of them during conversations.

Thorton usually works alone but a handler provides advice and support during missions. Maintaining a good relationship with your handler brings with it additional benefits during the mission. Sometimes helping one handler will alienate or anger another. It is up to you to decide which handlers you want on your side and which you can afford to let go. Sometimes, their lives may depend on your choices and you will have to choose between loyalty and the mission.